Thursday, June 12, 2008

Dear Rain Clouds...

Dear Rain Clouds,

I'm not sure if you're the same clouds that brought us over 100 inches of snow this past winter, but I'd like to introduce myself. I'm not happy. I'm wet. My umbrella has been overused. There's a tree down in my backyard.

It's very hard to enjoy spring, or in a few days, summer, when it rains every two seconds. I don't have the means to build an ark, nor do I really want to since I have no idea how to use a hammer with any accuracy.

I feel for the meterologists who are starting use colors like cyan and magenta in lieu of green and yellow. When the scale of colors gets to black I think it's safe to say that we've come to Armageddon. Would someone just please warn me when the swarms of locusts and wasps are on their way?

This is absolutely ridiculous. Who did Wisconsin piss off to deserve the last six months of absolutely ridiculous weather. Maybe I was lucky to have planned a winter wedding.

Please, let it stop!

Sincerely,

A very soaked Midwesterner

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